And Then There Was One
by Mira White
Summary: Family... Gone... Friends... Gone... Love... Gone...
1. The Loner

Disclaimer: I do not own Card Captor Sakura. It belongs to Clamp. 

Author's Note: Wow, it's been awhile since I've written a Cardcaptors story. Actually, it's been quite awhile since I've even read one! Well, anyway, this story idea just came to me, so I hope you like it. Please enjoy!

PS- This is written from Sakura's point of view when they are 18.

**_"And Then There Was One"_**

Chapter One: The Loner 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

            It's written in the sciences that some 10 billion to 20 billion years ago that the universe was compact, dense, and very hot. Out of nowhere, some phenomenal event occurred, a cosmic explosion called the "Big Bang". Ever since, the universe has been expanding and cooling.

            My life is similar to that of the Big Bang. Once small and ordinary, my life is now completely blown out of proportion, providing too much for me to handle. 

            Over the past eight years, I've been wondering where the word "normal" came from. I can sure tell you that I've had enough unordinary events on my plate to last me a lifetime. I've seen it all: dragons, talking stuffed animals, friendship, betrayal, and even love. In a world filled with magic and danger, nothing is "normal". Most people just choose not to see what lies beyond "normality" or what lies beyond the shield that protects them from the supernatural events of the world. 

            Take me for example. I was a normal ten-year-old girl at one time, not wanting to see or believe the magic that existed. Then the Clow came along, and it has turned my life upside down. 

            Sure, I had some good times. I made new friends, friends that would last for all eternity. But there were also those times when I just wanted to curl up in a ball and die. Cardcaptoring takes a lot out of a girl, and after a while, you'll learn to hate it. 

            Still, I tried to take everything in stride, learning new things as each day passed by. And somehow, I made it through it all. Here I am! I made it! Look at me now!  

            Yeah… Look at me now… Look at the wreck that I've become… I have now learned that Cardcaptoring **isn't even** **half** of what the definition of "hard" is. No, hard is something much more. 

            Hard is losing everything that you've learned to love and life and more. Hard is living out your days in loneliness and regret, wishing that you had a second chance to do things right. Hard is what my life has become. 

            I've lost them all, everyone I knew, loved, and cared about. Meiling, Yukito, Tomoyo, Touya, Syaoran… 

            As you probably already know, Meiling returned to Hong Kong after our Cardcaptoring adventures. She never wrote to me, or anything, although I sent several letters to her, but she never returned the favor. 

            Yukito quickly disappeared after his graduation. One day he was here, the next gone. I suppose that since my Cardcaptoring days were over he needn't stick around, since a guardian was no longer needed.

            Tomoyo left for college two months ago. She is attending the University of Tokyo. She wrote to me that college life is busy, and provides little time for simple pleasures. After that letter, I stopped writing her and calling her. I figured that she was implying that maybe we should stop corresponding since she was so engaged in activities.

            Touya… My big brother… My only brother… The one who understood me best, joked with me, laughed with me, teased me. I'll never understand why he was taken away from me, why things had to turn out the way they did. I've lived out my days since then in pain and sorrow, often wondering what would have happened if we hadn't fought, what would have happened if I had said "I love you" more times than I normally did. Would he have survived? Would he be right by my side at this very moment calling me "monster" once again?

            On the day of Touya's high school graduation, we fought before he left for school. Someone had left a mess in the kitchen the night before and dad was asking one of us to step up and take the blame. Touya accused me of leaving it, and I accused him, although I suspected it really had been Kero. We yelled at each other for over an hour, thinking of nastier comments to make as each minute passed by. Finally dad decided that it was me who had left the mess since one of my favorite foods had been left out. Touya smirked and laughed as he watched me laboring over the kitchen sink, washing dishes and scrubbing the stains that had been left on the floor. As he walked out the door for school, making one more comment about my dish duty, I screamed out that I hated him since he was always getting me in trouble. Hurt had registered in his eyes, and a sad look crossed his face. Slowly he closed the door, looking back at me for the last time. 

            While on his way to school, Touya was hit by a car. The driver hadn't been drunk and had been keeping their eyes on the road. As they rounded the corner, they saw Touya in the middle of the street. The driver tried to stomp on their brakes, but their reaction hadn't been fast enough… He had been hit… 

            I guess my intent to hurt Touya had really gotten to him. He **always** checks around that corner to make sure a car isn't coming before he crosses. Witnesses to the accident said that the car wasn't speeding, and Touya had just darted out in the middle of the street, not looking at all. He must have been thinking about something else… About how I said that I hated him… 

            If I hadn't made that remark, Touya would still be alive today. I **know** he would be. The accident was my fault. It's my fault that my brother is dead. It's my fault that I caused pain and sorrow for everyone who knew him. Although the accident was seven years ago, I still cry every night while I'm alone in my bed. Is Touya up there watching me in Heaven? I wish I could tell him that I was sorry, that I love him more than he could ever know, that I would take back every mean word that I ever said to him. 

            And as for Syaoran… Well, he left soon after Touya's death. Since all of the Cards had been captured, he no longer had any duties here in Tomeda. His family, the Li clan, needed him back at home in Hong Kong, so he could finish his training. 

            Saying goodbye to Syaoran at the airport was the worst moment of my life, that is, after losing Touya. It took me until that moment, when I was hugging Syaoran and crying on his shoulder, to realize that I loved him. Sure, I was only eleven, but eleven year olds can fall in love too. Everything about Syaoran made my stomach flip-flop, and a tingling feeling wash over my body. His steady gaze, his voice, the feel of his hand in mine, his determination to be the best Cardcaptor that he could be, his dark eyes that only lightened when he was around me… I guess that if I hadn't been faced with his leaving that it would have taken longer for me to fall for him. But we didn't have that time, and it was either then or never that I told him how I felt for him. And for some reason, I chickened out. I couldn't seem to bring myself to let him know my true feelings. What if he didn't feel the same way for me? Would the bond that we had as Cardcaptors be broken by my confession to him? I didn't know, and I didn't want to take that chance. All I could do was say goodbye and hope that we kept in touch. But how could I stand to lose someone else who was so dear to me? I had already lost Touya, and I was losing Syaoran too. So, as I gave him one last hug, I made a wish. A wish that we would one day find each other once again… That somehow, I would make it through the pain of losing him.

            Every night, for at least two years, I prayed that the next day Syaoran would call, or that I would receive a letter from him. Then one day, while I was cleaning my room, I found an old picture of Syaoran and me together in a Cardcaptoring stance. As I gazed longingly at that picture, I realized that he was never coming back, that he would never try to contact me. I had lost the only person I had ever truly loved… 

            After that day, I lost faith in the belief that wishes do come true, that if you pray hard enough anything can happen. It was up to me to take control of my own destiny. I couldn't just sit around waiting for miracles to happen like I had done for the past two years.

            When Tomoyo left for college, the little part of my life that hadn't been turned upside down soon was. All of my friends were gone… I had long ago stopped associating with the other girls of Tomeda, girls that I used to call friends. All they cared about was their hair and makeup, what boy they were going to go after next, etc. etc. etc. They didn't care about what really mattered in life: family and true love. How could I be friends with them when I already knew what life was all about, when I had already lost everything that I had to lose? I couldn't teach them about these values. They would have to find it out for themselves, and when they did, I would give them my friendship once more. 

            My friends… Gone… My family… Gone… The love of my life… Gone, and probably married by now. I had been left alone to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders, all of my hopes thrown in the gutter. 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Author's Note: * sniff * Very, very depressing. That was even depressing for me to write. I'm not quite sure yet if the rest of the story will be as dark; I'm still trying to figure out some events that will happen in between. But until then, please review and tell me what you think! Everything is welcome, even flames. And feel **very** free to give me any advice you feel necessary! Hope you enjoyed it!

~Sailor Polaris~

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Preview of Chapter 2… 

_            A mysterious note is left at Sakura's front door. Who is the sender? What do they want from her? Will Sakura be able to find the key to her past after all of these years?_


	2. The Letter

Disclaimer: I do not own Card Captor Sakura. That belongs to Clamp.

Author's Note: Hey everyone! Before I start with the next chapter I would like to write some personalized notes to the people who actually reviewed my last chapter.

**Tamelywild: **Thanks for the review! And sorry, it's not going to be an Eriol/Sakura fic. I don't know that much about Eriol since I've only seen some of the dubbed version.

* hides head in shame* Yes, I'm pathetic I know. But I saw all of the old season and then only a few of the new. Oh well, hopefully I'll see them all one day. Anyway, thanks for the review, and it will probably continue to stay dark throughout the story.

**Beautiful Midnight: **Awww… I didn't mean to make you upset. Let me just warn you now, like I did Tamelywild: this story will probably continue to stay dark. And I'm glad that you can't wait for Chapter 2; it makes me feel good to know that someone enjoys my stories! * grins * Thanks for reviewing!

**Yori-chan:** I'm glad that happy that there's more coming! When I'm writing this I feel bad for Sakura too. It's kind of difficult for me to write since I'm a happy go lucky kind of person. But the idea just popped into my head so I started writing it down!

**Neptune Avalon:** I know what you mean. Even though I told Yori-chan that I'm a happy go lucky kind of person, I do have my bad days when I sometimes feel like that. If you're having a rough time, I hope you get through it all right. Just keep faith in yourself.

**Gohan:** Really? My story was sadder than yours? Wow, I never thought it was possible for me to write a sad story. Anyway, let me address the subject of the story seeming like Touya's death was Sakura's fault. It only seems this way since the story is through Sakura's point of view. To me, Sakura seems like the kind of person who would lay all the blame upon herself. Don't worry, though. This issue will be addressed again in a later chapter. 

* drum roll * And now, here's the second chapter! I hope you enjoy it! Please review!

**_"And Then There Was One"_**

Chapter 2: The Letter 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

            As I walked the streets of Tomeda, my thoughts drifted to the dreary gray sky. A storm was approaching… All havoc was about to break lose…

            My eyes wandered to an old man on the sidewalk, his back leaning against the picket fence of a whitewashed house in the neighborhood next to mine. 

            "A penny for your thoughts!" he cried out, his raspy voice penetrating the space around us. 

            Guilt began to sink in. Here was someone with no home, no food, and no place to sleep. Why was I so depressed about all my problems when there were people in the world whose problems were as troublesome as mine, times a tenfold?

            I reached into my wallet and pulled out a twenty-dollar-bill, dropping it into the can that he held. "Have a nice meal tonight," I almost silently whispered, trying to put a smile of encouragement on my face. But the old man could see right through my mask of feelings. 

            "Come here, child," he spoke softly. I hesitantly walked toward him, placing my hand in his, sitting down right next to him. 

            The old man's gnarled fingers felt rough to the touch, and a shiver went up my spine. Who was this stranger? Why was he freaking me out like this?

            "I see your future. Friendship… Danger…" His eyes opened wide, a possessed gleam in them, as if they were going to roll back into their sockets. "Death…" The possessed gleam faded as the last word was spoken, and the old man's eyes returned to normal. "Be careful, my child. The future is in your hands. Make proper use of it."

            I stared at him, wide-eyed in confusion. For a moment I blinked. In that instant, he was gone. 

            Shaking my head, I continued along my unknown path. The wind swept my hair as I walked along and thought about what the old man had said. I was so lost in my thoughts that I barely noticed when I bumped into someone.

            "OOMF!" came the stranger's voice. Quickly, I looked below me, trying to see if the person I had knocked down was anyone I knew. Thankfully, I didn't recognize the person, saving me the embarrassment.

            Lending my hand, I helped the young man up off the ground. Tanned skin and chocolate eyes were donned on him, wind-blown, russet hair completing the handsome look. A smile played at the young man's lips, revealing sparkling, ivory pearls. "You'll have to watch where you're going," he teased. 

However, I mistakenly took his teasing for scorn. "I'm very, very sorry, Mr." I replied, trying to make amends with this mysterious man.

His grin widened. "Geez, you need to learn how to take a joke. I was just kidding. Actually, the accident was probably my fault; I wasn't watching where I was going."

"Oh," I answered. For the life of me, I couldn't think of anything more intelligent to say.

            "Well, I'm glad I ran into, Miss," the stranger articulated. I was looking for someone who might know the town. With the storm coming, I didn't think there would be anyone around."

            In this pause, the realization that something was familiar about the man came over me. I couldn't quite put my finger on it, though. How the heck did I know him?

            "You see, I'm from out of town, and I don't know my way around yet."

            The grocery boy! Yes, that's who it was. I had only seen him from a distance before, but now I knew it must be him. Tomoyo had once told me that it was a shame that the grocery boy was from out in the country and didn't live a bit closer, otherwise she would've gone out with him.

            "So could you please tell me where the cemetery is?" the grocery boy concluded. 

            Why would he want to visit the cemetery? Who did he know that would be buried in our town's small plot? I paused for a moment, and then relayed the directions to him. "Continue walking up this street until you reach the first traffic light. Make a right, walk to the next corner, and then make a left. It should be down about a block on your left."

            The young man smiled again. "Thanks for your help." I turned to leave, but he caught me by the arm. "And please, don't look so down. Cheer up a bit!" he grinned. 

            As we parted, I mumbled to myself, "Easy for you to say. You've probably led a good life." Then I took these words into consideration. If he had led a good life, then whose grave was he going to visit? Something inside me pulled; I knew what I had to do: follow him. I didn't want to follow; after all, that was the graveyard where Touya was buried. For some reason though, I felt compelled to do so. Curiosity must have gotten the better of me, I reasoned with myself. 

            Hastily, I whirled back around, briskly walking towards the young man, trying to make up the distance lost will I was pondering over my decision. I didn't, however, want him to know that I was following him, so I hid in the shadows as I ran along behind him. 

            In just a few short minutes we reached the dark, dank cemetery. Chills rushed up and down my spine. The last time I had visited the cemetery was the day we had buried Touya.  Tears threatened to spill from my eyes at the thought, but I held them back. Instead, I turned my attention back to the boy, trying to see whose grave he was visiting.

             As my eyes passed over the words written on the tombstone, I froze. Touya… That he was Touya's grave that he was visiting!

            My thoughts wouldn't settle. How did this stranger know Touya! He was definitely too young to have been one of his classmates. 

            The grocery boy looked on at the grave, the cheery attitude from just minutes before disappearing. Now sadness overcame him. You could sense it and feel it. 

            His mouth moved. Straining my ears, I intently listened to the words being spoken. 

            "Hey, buddy. How you doing?" he whispered gloomily. "What's life like up there in Heaven?" He paused. "I never thought I would say this, but I miss you. You were kind of like the older brother I never had. It's hard living with all girls, man. I didn't care if you called me names. It felt good to hang out with someone besides the girls I was surrounded with." Again, an unearthly silence... Then, "Have you been watching over Sakura for me like I asked you to?"

            My head flew up in astonishment. He just said my name! A man that I had no recollection of meeting before in my life had just said my name and was talking to my dead brother! What the **heck** was going on here? 

            In all of my confusion, I missed the last part of the conversation. The boy was turning to leave. I **_knew_** that I had to follow him now; I **_had_** to find out who this guy was. 

            We turned out of the cemetery and onto the main street of Tomeda. For a time, we walked on a straight path. On and on we went, minute after minute passing by. Weariness started to settle in, and until after a while, I didn't realize where we were going anymore. 

            Finally, after twenty minutes, the young man stopped. I raised my head from my downward position, which had been looking at the sidewalk. Once again, my eyes widened. The grocery boy was standing at the door of **_my _**house! **_My house!_**

            I shook my head in puzzlement. It didn't seem like I was going to find out what was going on any time soon. 

            He knocked on the door. When no one answered, he knocked again. Obviously, no one was home. Sighing, the young man removed an envelope from his jacket pocket and placed it on the doormat that at one time had proclaimed "WELCOME!" 

            As quickly as he had come, the grocery boy left. I was too curious to see what was in the envelope to follow him once more. Maybe it would answer my question of what this whole thing was about. 

            I rushed to my doorway and rapidly tore open the envelope. It was a letter, addressed to me. 

_Dear Sakura,_

_            It's been such a long time since we've last seen each other. I hope you can ever forgive me for my failure to correspond with you these last few years._

_            However, that's not really what this letter is about. Over the past few months I've been experiencing dark feelings and having nightmares when I lay down to sleep. In these nightmares, I'm back in Tomeda, fighting something, although I don't know what. As time has passed, the feelings have become stronger and the nightmares more frequent. Something terrible is about to happen; I just know it._

_            Please, as soon as you have time, visit me at my new residence: 1678 Cardinal Drive. We need to discuss this immediately and find a solution to the problem._

_                                                                                                Your friend,_

_                                                                                                Syaoran_

            The letter fluttered from my hands. Syaoran was back… My heart thumped wildly inside my chest as his image passed across my mind. He was back! My beloved was back!

            A cold breeze brushed my back. That's when I remembered the real task at hand. Something dark was lurking about… Something evil… If Syaoran could sense it, why couldn't I? 

            Shaking my head, I rushed towards Syaoran's new home. Luckily for me, Cardinal Drive was close by, otherwise I would have bailed out because of all the previous walking. 

            Hurriedly, I rapped on the door of the given address. The young man from earlier, Syaoran, opened the door and peered outside. "My help you, Miss?" he asked questioningly.

            "Syaoran," I whispered, "It's me, Sakura."

            His eyes widened in disbelief. "Sakura?"

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Author's Note: Yes, yes, I know. You saw that coming. Heck, it's not my fault if I lack originality. * sighs * Oh well, we can't all be good writers. But anyway, that chapter was **definitely** less dark than the last. I'm not sure how dark the others are going to be; it will be decided as I write them. Anyway, please review! Any type of review is welcome: good, bad, happy, and sad. You get the picture. Even flames are welcome! But hopefully more good than bad or some constructive criticism! * bends down on knees and prays for advice in writing next chapter *

~Sailor Polaris~

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Preview of Chapter 3… 

            _It's been said many times that the past is done and over with. But is it really? Sakura sure thought so, until now at least. Will Sakura and Syaoran renew their friendship? Will the couple be able to overcome the hurdle that had troubled them so many years before?_


	3. Hurdles

Disclaimer: I do not own Card Captor Sakura. That belongs to Clamp.

Author's Note: Hey, all! Well, here's the next chapter! Hope you like it! But first, my little notes to my reviewers!

**Lonely Tenshi:** I'll probably be adding up a new chapter every Sunday. It sometimes may be a little earlier, a little later, but most likely around then. Thanks for reviewing!

****

**Riley S:** No problem! I'll e-mail you whenever you like! I'm happy to know that someone actually likes my stories and wants to continue reading them! Thanks so much! 

****

**Linda:** * grins * Thanks for the review! I'm glad you liked it. About the call between Sakura/Tomoyo and the Syaoran thing… I'm going to be doing something along those lines, just not quite that. Thanks for the suggestions though! If you have any more I'd love to hear them. You, the readers, are what I want to please!

**Jesus Freak:** * smiles * I love the new name! And I hope that with your ongoing religious faith that you continue to make it the rest of the way of whatever you're going through!

**Halley:** * sticks out tongue * Evil buttmunch! LoL, just kidding… Although you are an evil buttmunch for not liking Syaoran! He is H-O-T: HOT! AND HE'S NOT GAY! And sorry, but I won't be bringing Meiling back even though I like her more now than I did. She just doesn't lend herself to the plot. You'll see what I mean in this chapter! Anyway, I'll see you in school!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (LoL, I still can't believe that you're not done that math test!) * grins * And I can't wait for singing lessons because we get to bug Debbie! FUN! Maybe we can finally convince her to give us Mr. Dib's e-mail! YAY! 

**Kikie:** Let me warn you now. It will get a little bit happier, and then it's going to get VERY sad again! Anyway, thanks for reviewing!

**Yori-chan:** You came back a second time! YAY! And you're welcome for mentioning you. I'll continue to mention you as long as you read my stories! * starts to smile * You think it's original? Really? * starts to yell * I HAVE AN ORIGINAL STORY! WHOOHOO! 

**Gred:** Sorry for not mentioning you in the last chapter! I didn't realize that you had reviewed until I posted the second chapter! Oh, and I know the feeling you mean. 

* sighs * The boy doesn't like me, and he's been acting like a real jerk lately, so I don't know if I still like him or not. Oh, and thanks for the compliments! 

PS- Congratulations on getting the part of Hope in _Anything Goes_! I LOVE that show!

"And Then There Was One" Chapter 3: Hurdles 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

It's been said many times throughout history that the past is done and over with. I, myself, always believed this theory to be true, but now I wonder. 

Touya's gone forever, that I know. I had thought that Syaoran would be too. How wrong I was…

            As I stood there, staring into those bottomless chocolate eyes of his, I found myself smiling for the first time since Syaoran had left seven years ago. 

            "Sakura?"

            His voice brought me back to reality. "Hey," I whispered softly, trying to put on the smile of a few moments earlier. 

            For a few more seconds he stared at me in shock, but then he remembered his manners. "Come in, come in," he said, placing a hand on my shoulder, escorting me through the door.

            Chills ran up and down my spine as I stepped into the living room. I could sense his aura spread throughout. I relished at the thought of working so closely with him again. Surely he would need the Sakura Cards to help defeat this new evil that he was sensing. 

            "Please," he grinned, "sit down."

            I took the seat closest to the door. Everything in the room was adorned with green, just like his aura. A jade carpet covered the floor while the walls were painted a soft sea foam green. The chair that I was sitting in was emerald, as were the others that were strategically placed throughout the room, along with the couch. 

            "So," I articulated, trying to fill the awkward silence that had come over us, "tell me about these feelings and nightmares you're having."

            Syaoran gazed into space for an instant, then answered. "How can I put this into words? The dreams," he shuddered, "were awful." A pause… Then, "You were there… We were both fighting side-by-side, using all of our energy and power. Yet, no matter what we did, the enemy just wouldn't die; in fact, it grew stronger. It had wrecked the whole town: surrounding houses were in shambles, cars overturned, trees laying on their sides, huge craters formed in the ground… There was no living creature except for us. Lifeless bodies lay by our feet and were scattered throughout the rest of our fighting grounds. Whispers of coming death filled the air, whispers of hope lost and dreams shattered. And then…" Syaoran choked on his words, a look of pure terror spreading across his features.

            I clamped my hand down on his shoulder urgently. "Syaoran, you **have to** tell me what happened. How are we ever going to defeat this enemy if I don't know what to expect?"

            He nodded his head, and then breathed in deeply. "And then," he stammered, "you sent a blast at the enemy. In retaliation for your attack, it sent an explosion of power back at you; only it was 100 times larger than the one you had sent. And… and…" Syaoran gulped, afraid. 

            My hand was still on his shoulder, so I gave an encouraging squeeze. The gesture seemed to work. 

            "The blast was too much for you. It… it k-killed you instantly." My eyes widened in shock, but there was more. "Then it turned on me. I faced it willingly, knowing what my fate was going to be. However, right before the blast hit me, I woke up."

            Syaoran looked at me, his face broken, and torn between expressing the feelings of fright or pity for the fate that I was going to have to face. 

            I swallowed silently, and then turned to face Syaoran. "Well then, we're just going to have to anticipate all of the enemy's moves so we can **make sure** that that doesn't happen. Hey, maybe that's why you were sent those dreams. Now you know how the enemy fights and you'll always be one step ahead of him." Where was this advice coming from? I hadn't talked this way in years. Normally, **I** was the one who looked on the dark side of things. Was it because our "team" was reunited? Or was it because I was with the person who was now the dearest thing in the world to me, and I didn't want to see him get hurt just like I had?

            "You think so?" he quietly questioned.

            "I know so. We just have to take everything in stride, one day at a time, one step at a time."

            "Gee, Sakura, I never quite thought of it that way." Syaoran smiled, and the eleven-year old boy that I had known years before shone through. 

            "It has just occurred to me," I conveyed, "that you look the same as you did seven years ago."

            He grinned. "But the question is, am I still the same person as I was then?" he replied, brushing aside the previous topic. 

            "I don't know," I remarked. "Are you?"

            "Not in the least."

            "How so?"

            Syaoran smiled mischievously. "Go on, ask me some questions and find out for yourself," he replied.

            I bit my lip in frustration. There was one question in particular that I wanted to ask, but was afraid to do so. What if I gave myself away? Would I seem too eager? A minute passed. This was silly; I was taking too long in deciding. I would ask the question that I wanted to, but first a few that wouldn't seem as obvious. "Do you still want to become the leader of the Li Clan?" I finally asked. 

            "You bet I do!" he exclaimed.

            My eyebrow raised in contemplation. "I thought you said that you had changed."

            His smile grew wider. "In personality, yes. In interests and spirits, no."

            "I see," I replied, for lack of anything better to say. 

            Silence… Then, after a while, "Well?" Syaoran inquired. "Aren't you going to ask me any more questions?"

            Now was the time. I mean, what other questions could I ask him about his personality? There was the only one that I could think of. "Let me guess. You're married to Meiling and unwillingly."

            Syaoran's eyes twinkled with a sparkling glow. "Actually, I'm not."

            My heart dropped at those words. I knew it. Over time, his dislike of her had grown to love. A love that I had longed and prayed for… A love that my world had revolved around… A love that would never be mine… 

            I was so lost in my thoughts that I almost missed Syaoran's next sentence. Thankfully, I caught it just in time.

            "Meiling is happily married, but not to me."

            My mouth dropped open in shock, while my heart almost stopped beating. "WHAT?" 

            "It's true," he smirked. A year ago Meiling visited Tokyo, where she met a young Japanese gentleman by the name of Gifuto. The two were instantly taken with each other, and are now spending their honeymoon in Hawaii." 

            Thoughts whirled in my head. Meiling was MARRIED? How could this possibly be? Syaoran and Meiling had been betrothed since birth! How could she just instantly break the agreement and with so little hassle?

            But that's not what I really was concerned with. Now that Meiling was married, was Syaoran single? Inside of my chest, my heart was doing cartwheels at the prospect of being able to tell Syaoran how I really felt. My life was finally looking up!

            Now then, what could I say? How could I break my feelings to the man I loved? For years I had dreamed of this moment, planning every detail, every step of saying "I love you". Why oh why couldn't I remember what I had so carefully labored my thinking over?

            "Hawaii… How exotic…" Those three words just seemed to pop out of my mouth. Where had they come from?

            The smile on Syaoran's face was genuine now. "Yeah, that's what Christine said."

"Christine? And who, pray tell, may that be?" I asked, curious to find out. Was this Syaoran's long lost cousin or something?

            "Oh, I'm sorry. I completely forgot to tell you! That's another thing that's changed about me. I actually have a girlfriend, and am willing to do so. As you probably have already guessed, her name is Christine. She's an exchange student from America who is studying at the University of Hong Kong," Syaoran beamed. 

            My heart plummeted. The years I had spent of dreaming that one day I would be safe by his side, his arms wrapped around me, my head laying against his chest, hearing the rhythmic beating of his heart were now shattered. There had always been that one little hope of Syaoran and Meiling getting a divorce because they didn't really love each other. Now, that hope was gone. When Syaoran had told me that Meiling had gotten married, I knew that that was my one little glimmer of light in the storm. But no, Syaoran had found himself a new girl, someone he had chosen to love over me. Why must God punish me like this? Hadn't I suffered through enough pain and sorrow during my lifetime? 

            The thoughts were just too much for me. I looked into Syaoran's eyes and saw there the joy that his new girlfriend brought him. "This Christine sounds like quite a nice girl," I breathed almost silently, my voice cracking for my effort in trying to hold back the sobs that were threatening to overcome me. "I wish you two the best of luck."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Author's Note: "By looking in his eyes, will I see beyond tomorrow? By looking in his eyes, will I see beyond the sorrow, that I feel?" Oops, sorry. That last part was just inspired by the song "In His Eyes" from the musical _Jekyll and Hyde_. Heehee! Anyway… * sniffs * Poor Sakura… Will her life ever look up? * evil grin * Only I know the answer to that. Well, actually, Juno knows the answer to, since she threatened me with bodily harm if I didn't tell her. But that's beside the point! Anyway, please review! And thanks sooooo much for reading this story!

~Sailor Polaris~

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Preview of Chapter 4… 

            _Sakura never thought that she would see the day when she wasn't happy to see Syaoran. Now she regrets those years of wishing for his return. Could Sakura's star-crossed romance finally be at an end? _


End file.
